The Law of Attraction is the belief that “like attracts like.” The principle states that if you think positive thoughts, you will have positive results; if you think negative thoughts, you will have negative results. You attract what you think about. An everyday example of the Law of Attraction is when you start thinking about someone and suddenly she calls you. Or, if you are considering adopting a puppy, you see puppies everywhere you look. The Law of Attraction is always operating. Like the law of gravity, it never fails.

It sounds so easy! Yet, why does the Law of Attraction seem to fail most of the time even though you think positively and visualize success? The reason is that your subconscious beliefs, values, and habits can block your success. Both parts of your mind affect the Law of Attraction – your conscious mind and your subconscious mind. Your conscious mind creates images of what you want to attract and can consciously, logically, set goals and promises to attain them. Your subconscious, however, is the critical component that makes or breaks the Law of Attraction’s effectiveness for you. Your subconscious mind controls your habits, expectations, emotions, and actions and determines your success. The conscious and subconscious mind must be in harmony. 

The Flying Wallendas

You may know of the “Flying Wallendas,” the famous family of tightrope aerialists. As Warren Bennis describes in his book Leaders, Karl Wallenda, the founder, often said, “Being on the tightrope is living. Everything else is waiting.” Karl knew that he put his life at risk every time he walked the tightrope and yet it made him feel alive. Then on March 22,1978, Wallenda fell to his death traversing a 75-foot-high wire in San Juan, Puerto Rico. In interviews after the fateful event, his wife said, “All Karl thought about for three straight months prior to the San Juan event was falling. It was the first time he’d ever thought about that, and it seemed to me that he put all his energies into not falling rather than walking the tightrope.” Mrs. Wallenda added that her husband went so far as to personally supervise the installation of the tightrope, making certain the guy wires were secure, “something he had never even thought of before.” Wallenda was virtually destined to fall as he poured his energies into preventing a fall rather than walking the tightrope. This is a very unfortunate example of the Law of Attraction at work. 

You manifest what you believe

What you believe internally manifests what is occurring externally. If your subconscious believes that you are unlovable, you will not be in a healthy, loving relationship no matter how many times you say that is what you want. If your subconscious believes that you will never have enough money, you never will. If your subconscious believes that you will never be happy, you will never be happy. 

An attitude of gratitude

Gratitude plays an important role in activating the Law of Attraction. Gratitude is an energy that becomes magnified when it returns to you. What you put into the world is what you get out of it. If you think negative thoughts about your life, you will have a difficult life. Conversely, if you give more love, you will receive more love. If you are generous with your money, you will receive more money. If you live a life filled with gratitude, you will always have things for which to be grateful. 

Five stages of The Law of Attraction

Decide what you want. It is essential to be clear about what you want. Your ambiguous goals send blurry requests and vibrations to the universe. It is tough to attract what you want when you are continually beaming unclear messages. Clarify, visualize and expect the best. Many clients create a “vision board” to clarify exactly what they want. 

Decide that you are worthy of it. You may not believe you deserve what you want to attract. Your subconscious may be sending the message to your conscious mind that you are not good enough or special enough. Your subconscious mind is more persuasive than your conscious mind and can overrule it. Believe that you deserve the best.

Decide that you can have what you want. Another self-limiting belief to the Law of Attraction is that you do not believe that it is possible to get what you want. It is essential to take a massive leap of faith and convince yourself that you can have what you want.

Recognize the abundance in the world. Acknowledge that the world has abundance. The world is full of compatible partners, wealth, kind and generous people, love and peace. You can change the neural pathways in your subconscious from a state of “need and want” to a state of “abundance.” It takes persistence, tenacity, and focus. When you realize you are thinking negative thoughts, STOP IT! Immediately respond with a positive affirmation like “I live a fulfilling life” or “I am healthy and full of vitality” or “I have all the love I need.”

Believe what you want is going to happen. At this stage, the temptation is to get sidetracked by your questions of who, when and how. Stop worrying about HOW. The answers to these will come. Focus on what you want, recognize that it is out there in abundance, believe that you can have it and that it will come to you. 

The “action” portion of The Law of Attraction

Now, it is time for the action portion – the second half of the word “Attraction.” If you want to meet your soulmate, it is vital to state the intention, align your subconscious with your conscious desire and then take steps to move toward your outcome. If you sit in your apartment merely dreaming of your soulmate’s arrival, no one will come. If you dream of winning the lottery, buy a ticket! If you want to increase the abundance in your life, behave like a person of abundance. If you want more love, give more love. If you want more compassion, be more compassionate – even the smallest actions matter. For example, you can increase the level of abundance in your life by resolving to tip more generously. By adding a few extra dollars to the server’s tip, you demonstrate abundance in the universe.

Live your most abundant life by making The Law of Attraction an important tool in your toolbox!

Dr. Susan Murphy is a best-selling author, business consultant and speaker specializing in relationships, conflict, leadership, and goal-achievement. She is co-author of LifeQ: How To Make Your Life Your Most Important Business and In the Company of Women. She can be reached at [email protected].

Read or write a comment

Comments (8)

  • iris Anderson

    Dr. Susan Murphy speaks Truth as she shares her knowledge with us. Dr. Murphy makes my life and the lives of those around us better. Never too late to learn her methods of living a harmonious life to the fullest.

    • Dr. Susan Murphy

      Dear Iris, what a special comment from you. Thank you for reading the article and for your kind words. Your supportive comment inspires me to keep on writing.

  • Dear Susan,

    This is something I needed to think about today. Thanks for sending this article to me, as you are an optimist and I was losing some of my optimism, lately. It gave me lot’s to think about

    • Dr. Susan Murphy

      Thank you, Jodie, for your comment. I am so happy that you find my articles and books worthwhile and thought-provoking.

  • Elizabeth Wickham

    Thank you Susan for an enlightening and positive article. It is much needed! I’m reminded to follow through on my Three Blessings exercise by Dr. Martin Seligman that I read in his book “Flourish.”

    • Dr. Susan Murphy

      Dear Elizabeth, Thank you for your terrific comment about my article. I appreciate that you read it and that you mentioned Dr. Martin Seligman’s three blessings exercise. I agree that Dr. Seligman has done some great work using the Law of Attraction and gratitude.

  • Diana Wentworth

    What a wise woman you are, Dr. Susan! Thank you for always pointing toward the positive!

  • Dr. Susan Murphy

    Dear Diana, Thank you so much for your inspiring message. I appreciate your consistent support of my work. It means the world to me and helps keep my focus on the positive.


Living Wellness with Jenniferbanner your financial health michelle sarnamentoring the futureNaturopathic Family Medicine with Dr. ShannonThe Paradigm Shift in Medicine TodayConventionally Unconventional with Kinder Fayssoux, MD