Do you find yourself looking for “balance” in your life? What is it that our spirit truly seeks in this ongoing desire?

Whenever I hear someone say, “I need to find balance in my life,” I can sense the dampening of passion within their spirit. The Oxford definition for balance (as a noun) is “an equal distribution of weight; equal proportions.” Balance as a verb means “to keep something in a steady position; to offset or compare the value of one thing with another.”

While I understand the ideal concept of having balance, I have yet to experience it as it is defined. I don’t know about you, but I have not, and probably will never spend a balanced or equal amount of time in my work, physical exercise, spiritual practices, getting together with friends and family and vacation time. I have found maneuvering to achieve balance a never-ending, unsatisfying (or very short satisfying) chase.   

About four years ago, it occurred to me that I might not be asking the more important question of what I – my spirit – was genuinely needing and wanting. I am a music major with an emphasis on vocal performance. I’ve toured as a vocalist around the country, recorded on many albums with various artists, performed live at some of LA’s famous nightclubs and am a voting member of the National Academy of Arts and Sciences (aka, The Grammys). As such, I recognize that harmonies often make the song more interesting, engaging, passionate and fuller within vocal and instrumental compositions.  Without the harmonies and other dynamics of tempos, rests, pianissimos, crescendos, fortes and more, the song and songwriter might not be too fulfilled. Though a one-person band or solo melody can be fabulous, I wouldn’t want to perform that way every day of my life.

I thought, HARMONY. To me, having harmony in my life is simply being present in the moment with whatever or whomever. Could I spend five hours working with clients, five hours meditating, five hours at the gym, and five hours hanging with my friends today? My answer is no. However, I can be fully present in the 20 minutes I spend with friends, my 50 minutes at the gym, my five hours with clients, and my 10 minutes meditating. 

According to Merriam Webster, harmony is “a pleasing combination of arrangements of different things.”

I have chosen not to use the word “balance” in my vocabulary because I feel more empowered and elevated when using “harmony” to express my spirit’s need and desire for a fulfillment that is more easily achievable throughout my day.

You may be inclined to hold on to the goal of achieving balance, but maybe, in being present right now, you are creating harmony in that particular area of your life. 

Timothy Courtney is a psychic medium in Palm Springs and can be reached at

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