When we think about improving our health and happiness, we often focus on diet, exercise, sleep and/or finances. But there’s another powerful factor that is less obvious yet deeply influential. That factor is the people with whom we surround ourselves.

Business philosopher Jim Rohn famously said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” One intentional way to harness that influence is by creating your own personal board of directors.

A personal board of directors is a group of trusted individuals who offer insight, accountability, and diverse perspectives on your life’s decisions. Think of yourself as the CEO of your life. As the CEO, you get to choose the people who help you navigate challenges, stay aligned with your values and grow in meaningful ways. This simple idea can have profound effects on your mental, emotional, spiritual and even physical well-being.

Identify your needs. Before choosing board members, take stock of your life’s major areas: health, career, finances, relationships and personal development. Ask yourself where you need the most guidance right now. Maybe you’re trying to advance professionally, start a business, improve emotional well-being, prepare for retirement, lower your cholesterol or find a new relationship. Different goals call for different kinds of advisors. Clarity about your needs ensures you build a board that truly supports your growth.

Who belongs on your board? Diversity is essential, not just in background, but in strengths, thinking styles and lived experience. Your board doesn’t need to be made up of people older or more accomplished than you; peers can be just as valuable. Consider including:

The Challenger: pushes you to think bigger and avoid settling. Unafraid to ask tough questions.
The Empath: listens deeply, helps you process emotions without judgment. Brings calm when life feels chaotic.
The Strategist: breaks big goals into actionable steps and helps you stay organized.
The Cheerleader: believes in you wholeheartedly and reminds you of your progress when you forget. A good sense of humor helps.
The Expert: a mentor, coach or someone with relevant experience in an area you want to grow.

When selecting members, prioritize qualities over titles. Look for honesty, trustworthiness, good listening skills and a willingness to offer constructive feedback. No single person can fill all these roles. You’re building a team!

Establishing the relationship. You don’t need to formally ask someone, “Will you be on my personal board of directors?” That can feel awkward or overly formal. Instead, cultivate relationships naturally. Reach out for advice, schedule occasional check ins and express appreciation for their guidance. Over time, these individuals will organically become part of your advisory circle.

How to make your board effective. A few principles can help your board function well:

Aim for 4–7 people. This gives you enough diversity without becoming overwhelming.
Engage regularly. Your board is not a static list; it’s an active support system. Schedule periodic check-ins monthly, quarterly or as needed. These can be coffee chats, phone calls or thoughtful emails. Use these interactions to share updates, ask for input and reflect on your progress.
Come prepared. When you seek advice, bring clear questions or topics. Be open to feedback, even when it’s uncomfortable. The value of your board lies in honest perspectives, not validation.
Avoid overburdening anyone. Be mindful of how often you reach out and what you ask of each person.
Offer reciprocity. While your board supports you, relationships should never be one-sided. Share resources, make introductions or offer your own perspective when they need it. Mutual contribution strengthens the connection and makes them sustainable over time.

The role of your board. Your board isn’t there to tell you what to do. Its purpose is to offer perspective, ask thoughtful questions, help you see blind spots, celebrate your wins and keep you accountable to the goals you set.

By intentionally surrounding yourself with people who challenge, support and inspire you, you create a powerful structure for personal and professional growth. Your personal board of directors becomes a reminder that you don’t have to navigate life alone—and that the right people can elevate every part of your journey.

Dr. Susan Murphy is a best-selling author, business consultant and speaker on relationships, conflict, leadership and goal-achievement. Her 13th book, Leading Successful Teams (used at Harvard, Stanford and the Mayo Clinic), is available online. www.DrSusanMurphy.com.